the amount of emotional & mental affliction i have been battling these past few months have been my greatest tragedy thus far — not money, not humans, just myself. not knowing when, yet incessantly visualizing my downfall has been the hardest pill to try and not swallow. you know, everyone always tells you that progress, growth, self love — whatever the fuck you want to call it — comes from uncomfortable circumstances, but they never tell you how heartbreaking those experiences can be.
i had a revelation: i have no choice when it comes to conquering myself.
i cant pick who, what, when, where and why. i have no freedom. i cant outrun my trepidations, i have had absolutely no choice but to face them head on. my mental health is on a continuing journey satiated with the ebb & flow of life’s magic and misfortunes.
i had a revelation: its do or die; let me do because i cant handle defeat, not like this.
cheers,
e.lux
